Although our world population has grown in recent decades, we've become more isolated from our neighbors than ever before. We've evolved into a society that prefers sending e-mail rather than engaging in a conversation, watching reality TV shows instead of actually participating in real life, and turning to Internet chat rooms for friends instead of joining a local community group. What a sad and lonely world!

A smile is a wonderful start in any social situation. This simple gesture is great for forming meaningful relationships with others, instead of just e-mailing or instant messaging them.

We all have the ability to smile. With a smile, you can uncover the special bond we all share with other human beings and actually connect with them in real life settings.

A smile can be an excellent way to begin a spiritual connection with someone else. Smile and the act of laughing transcends all language barriers and gives people a common ground on which to relate. No matter if you’re young or old, healthy or ill, male or female, each of us has an innate capacity for humor and can use laughter, or smiles to break down emotional walls and reach out to others.

A smile equals a positive state of mind. Sometimes we need to laugh, while other times we simply need someone to sit with us. A smile is never hurtful, nor does it degrade a person's spirit. It's always uplifting, and it gives people a temporary release of any negativity they may have.

To give people what they need to reach a more positive state of mind, you must let the other person know that you understand and that you care. One way to accomplish this is to be mindful of the person's state of mind and health, and to match the other person's communication style so they feel comfortable. Pace your breath with the other person or mirror his or her gestures and movements so that you're in sync. Make the volume, tone, and pitch of your voice similar to the other person's. You want the other person to see, hear, and feel you on his or her level in order to form a connection.

The more mindful you become of people's attitudes, feelings, and emotions, the more connected you'll feel with them. You'll begin to sense the bond you’ve built in even the most miniscule of moments. When a stranger walks by and nods at you in recognition, when your friend places his hand on yours, when an elderly neighbor asks you to sit with him or her for just one more minute…those are the moments when you'll sense the connection that has formed. Again, the actual act of smiling may never occur but rather, it's the positive atmosphere you help create that will keep the other person smiling. As a result, the connection will spontaneously occur.

Finding a smile in a situation is a matter of allowing that little childlike part of you to come out and play. Regardless of how you perceive yourself, you do have a childlike essence within. We all do. Some people are just more comfortable letting it show than others. In today's fast-paced, goal oriented world, it's easy to understand why the inner child often gets squashed. So many people are filled with sadness, anger, and frustration that those emotions seem to take over. However, if you can put a humorous spin on things, your heart and spirit will soar. Smiling, in essence, can help you achieve a greater sense of inner peace. In the midst of this serenity you'll feel more at ease with yourself and around others, and therefore more emotionally available to connect.

Realize, though, that there may be times when smiling is not appropriate. For example, if someone is in the middle of a crisis, it's often difficult to step back and see the event from a different perspective. However, when you look for the smile in life as a part of your daily routine, you can better develop and encourage the positive perspective that's needed when times get hard.

Smile to a stranger, saying "hello" to someone who looks lonely, being patient with the person in front of you in the grocery store line - all these are simple ways to make connections and spread a smile to others. Remember, a smile is not always about jokes and being humorous. Sometimes it's about comforting another, being there for someone, and offering hope when none seems to exist. These are the things that entice people away from a place of negativity and invite them into a place filled with positive energy. When you can do this for another, you can break through existing or perceived barriers and pave the way for a meaningful relationship. You then have the beginnings of a truly positive connection
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Ben Gurion Matsas